Bfn

Despite having the strangest and most painful ovulation I’ve ever had, followed by every pregnancy symptom you can think of, this cycle was a bust. I’m already back on the letrizole train for this next cycle and have many more resting follicles than before, so hopefully this one will work! If it doesn’t, then the baby making will be on hold for another year because of school. If it doesn’t work, there is also a slight possibility that we will make our peace with just having one kid since I ain’t getting any younger over here. Hopefully we won’t have to make that decision! 

In happier news, Jen and I have found a wonderful new way to deal with the horrible meltdowns Ali has been having. Well, Jen discovered the technique in one of her therapy books or something, did you know she’s a therapist? Well, she runs a homeless program at the VA, but does a couple nights of therapy too, so she comes up with some cool stuff sometimes from the reading she does. She brought it up by saying, ‘hey, I was reading some bullshit a while back about acknowledging your toddler’s feelings or something when they are freaking out. We should try it, I can’t live in this state of perpetual screaming anymore.’ We have totally been kneeling down and calmly saying to Ali that we understand she is upset, and it’s ok, and we know that she can control her emotions, calm down and use your words. I was soooo skeptical, but that ‘bullshit’ totally works! The idea behind this approach is that even though the meltdown is (probably) irrational, they still feel bad and out of control, and validating their feelings helps them get it together. Life is so much more pleasant for all of us, including miss Ali, now that the tantrums have lessened in frequency and duration.  

 My girls playing on their devices. 

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8 Responses to Bfn

  1. Yep, I can vouch for that “bullshit!” 😉 if you need anymore resources or guidance in that direction, I can probably find some good articles along those lines. Oh, and she might dig reading The Whole-brained Child.

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  2. Crap. And sorry to hear about the BFN!

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    • kayrosey says:

      It’s ok, I’ll be more bummed about it if this next one doesn’t work because that’s it for at least a year.

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      • That sucks you have to take school into consideration. I had horrible pregnancy brain and told myself I could try for a second baby after I finish my IBCLC exam. Now that I’m not moving for a two year program, my new goal is financial stability, my own place, and being in good health. Then I can try.

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      • kayrosey says:

        Those things are important! One of the biggest reasons I’m going into nursing is the schedule, I don’t want to do the 45hr m-f work week I had before having a kid. It’s sort of ironic that school is interfering with baby #2…

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      • The family I worked for here for a year and now I am friends with, both parents are nurses. They have long days/nights but there aren’t many of them.

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  3. Sorry about the BFN friend…good luck on the next cycle…we’re rooting for ya! And also, that is what we do with Mary to validate her feelings (even though to our adult brains it is the most ridiculous thing!) and you’re right..totally works, every time!

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