I’m sitting, without children, in a quiet and relatively clean house! This is my new Tuesday thing now that my clinical hours are over for the semester and we have childcare for the boys. I probably should be doing homework or laundry or something during these glorious couple hours, but blogging and netflixing sound like more fun, so I’m going with it.
So, things are actually pretty good over here, all things considered. Having childcare for the boys has been a life saver, and as a bonus we really like the lady watching the boys and will keep her in mind for any future needs once these next 7 weeks are over and I resume my stay at home mom career for the summer. Well, that’s not exactly accurate. Sooner or later once the HR department gets moving, I’ll be working two 12 hour shifts a week at the hospital near me, so I’ll technically be a working mom. The shifts run 3p-3a, so we shouldn’t need daycare for the kids, my lovely wife will just have to do dinner and I will just be tired sometimes. But, if it turns out that I’m crazy and mean with that little bit of sleep, we will have our back up plan with having someone we like and trust to watch the kiddos!
Speaking of the kiddos, I think the last time I wrote there was some uncertainty with Ks dad, and we weren’t sure what was going on with his timeline with us. Finally Jen got sick of waiting for dad to get ahold of us, and just called him herself. After she broke the ice, things have been really good with dad, and he sees K every week, and keeps him for an unsupervised overnight visit. As we are learning the hard way, situations can/will change in an instant, but as it stands we are looking at K going to live with his dad within the next month. Dad doesn’t have to do any evaluations or drug testing or classes or whatever, he just has to prove that he’s reliable and that he has a good relationship with K. So far, so good with that! K is happy to see his dad, unhappy to leave him when we pick him up, and has remained the cheerful little dude he’s been this whole time. On a personal level, I’ve chatted with dad for hours on end a few times and I really like him. We are an unlikely pair, a young black guy in his early 20s with his pack of Newports and his pants hanging off his butt and an old white lady in her late 30s with her Starbucks coffee and mom jeans, but we are totally buddies. Hopefully we can stay in touch at least enough to keep the boys in contact, assuming little dude stays with us.
Like I said, we are learning that nothing is really set in stone in this foster care world, but for now we are still looking at little dude staying with us for the foreseeable future. Mom finally did get her visitations set up, so those start this week (yikes!), but this will be a long term placement at least, most likely an adoption. There are just too many things that keep popping up now that the social worker is digging into the situation, and there is a history of non-compliance/drug addiction/mental illness/neglect of all of her responsibilities, which I would be surprised if the mom overcame to get her boys back. For example, she has so many animal cruelty and neglect charges that she’s banned from owning a pet until 2025! If only the same thing applied to having children, right?
And then there’s Ali. Ohhhh, Ali. It’s hard to tell if she’s reacting to having siblings, or if this is normal, shitty toddler stuff, but she’s driving everyone crazy. So much whining! So much crying! It’s not constant where every day is another day in hell like it was from 18-24 months, but I’d almost rather the tantrums than this whiny crap. I know, this too shall pass, and eventually Jen will come up with some other hippy crap I’ll roll my eyes at but that will work to help stop it, but until then…until then I will be annoyed with her. On the plus side, she has accepted and even come to love her temporary brothers. Her and K are always playing and fighting and hugging, and his name is the first word out of her mouth in the morning and the last thing she talks about before going to sleep. She also takes the big sister role with little dude seriously. I often find her reading books to him or feeding him sippy cups on her lap like you would give a baby a bottle. That cuteness almost cancels out the awful whiny parts, almost…